I wish I could say that Erins story is uncommon, but that is far from the truth its happening right here in our own backyard, Bucco said. I will come get you, I know where you live, Erin recalled. Erin Merryn is the author of Stolen Innocence, Living for Today, An Unimaginable Act, Bailey No Ordinary Cat, and The Diary of a Cat Named Carrot. Erin Elizabeth heard over the years from 11-13 "Nobody will believe you, you have no proof, you will destroy our large extended family, this is our secret don't tell anyone." It brings it all back to the surface. Now I have somebody I love and trust abusing me," Merryn said. Forgiveness is what set me free. Erin Elizabeth had cheerful holidays turned into a fight to protect herself from evil where she often lost. She wanted him to know how much his actions had affected her life. Erin Merryn testified Tuesday in an Ohio Senate committee about 'Erin's Law.' Under Erins Law, the New Jersey Commissioner of Education must provide school districts with age-appropriate sample learning activities and resources designed to implement this requirement. My name is Erin Merryn and I am a survivor of child sexual abuse. It is my hope hearing my message today youll see the importance of what Im here to talk to you about, said Erin Merryn. Its somebody they know and trust.. Should someone have known something was wrong sooner? In just a few short years, she has already persuaded half the countryto pass similar versions of the law. What are the most persistent knowledge gaps? COLUMBUS, Ohio The Ohio Senate is considering a bill to teach elementary, middle and high school students how to protect themselves from sexual predators. From the age of 11 to 13, I was repeatedly sexually abused at the hands of a family member, an older cousin, she said. Victims of abuse know their perpetrators 80% to 90% of the time, says David Finkelhor, director of the Crimes Against Children Research Center at the University of New Hampshire. She is the founder of Erin's Law, which is a group advocating for child sexual abuse awareness. Her dad singled me out during the party. In her diary Erin Merryn reveals how her life was transformed one night when, as an eleven-year-old, she was sexually abused in her grandparents condo by her cousin, someone she loved and trusted. ", Merryn's family, including her two sisters, moved to another neighborhood in the same town when Merryn was 8, and she stopped seeing Ashley. Merryn cautions that you can never just go by how many registered sex offenders are in your area. I wouldn't have quit my job four years ago as a master's level counselor to go after this had I not been lead by the Lord. Names were the only thing she changed. Have there been times in your life when haven't done well? It just turned into a screaming match between my mom and his mom, your son did this, your girls are liars, remembered Erin. To a child who has been told so many threats to stay silent the idea of being taken to a police station can often scare a child. If they feel they are in danger or in an uncomfortable situation, they can call home and use the code word, something as simple as, I forgot my math homework at school. . Im terribly concerned about that, said OBrien. Merryn: There is so much shame and stigma attached to sexual abuse. Because so often, people that are being abused do not report it until theyre in their 30s, 40s and 50s cause nobody ever gave them the message onhow tospeak up and tell, Merryn said. Forgiving him allowed me to move forward with my life and decide to no longer let this thing be something I should be ashamed of, no longer allowing it to be a negative in my life, but letting it be a positive.. As an adult, she's reclaimed the voice her. Do you know if it was as healing for him as it was for you? Erin has been traveling state to state testifying to lawmakers to pass Erin's law for 7 years. Merryn says starting when she was six, she was sexually abused by a neighbor, then at 11 by an older cousin. But her nightmare was just beginning. Merryn suffered sexual abuse by a male neighbor at ages six to eight[2] and by a teenage cousin at ages 11 to 13. After it was republished by Health Communications in early 2005, she began traveling the nation telling her story about the sexual abuse she endured at hundreds of high schools, colleges, sexual assault centers, child abuse conferences and community events. The fact that a motel is not telling families that sex offenders are living there should be a crime, Merryn said. I am so confident I will get this law passed in all 50 states, because God has already told me it will happen. Ill never be abused again, its just all gonna go away.. Someone should have known in my earlier years when I was being abused by an adult neighbor. Merryn successfully passed it in her state of Illinois in 2013 and has been traveling from one state capital to another testifying to state lawmakers to . Erin Merryn, A Voice for the Voiceless. He was free, but the rage inside Erin remained. Merryn: Many don't realize that there are 42 million survivors in America of child sexual abuse. Caught you off guard? Maryland is the latest state, joining the crusade last month. Merryn now. The law was passed in a number of states,[7] with New York becoming the 37th in 2019. As the abuse continued, and as she was forced to see her abuser over and over again in social situations, she struggled with self-doubt, panic attacks, nightmares and the weight of whether or not to tell her terrible secret. Our guest speaker for the Luncheon will now be Erin Merryn, childhood sexual abuse survivor turned author, speaker, child advocate and activist, and the force behind Erin . Choosing to forgive has led me to live for today.. The abuse continued and Erin struggled with the secret that hung over her, a secret that eventually destroyed a family and took Erin's innocence. The words of my cousin began haunting me. Erin Merryn (born February 2, 1985) is the author of Stolen Innocence, Living for Today, and An Unimaginable Act. As a result, she has been interviewed by many major news organizations and TV programs beginning in 2006, on Good Morning America, Oprah, CNN, Today Show, Fox, Katie Couric, Nightline, TLC, OWN, MSNBC, People Magazine, Time Magazine, Glamour Magazine, USA Today, London Times, New York Times, Chicago Tribune, and dozens more local media. It is when they hear my story of how I was raped, and how my abusers controlled the situation by being the only ones talking to me about what was happening, that they "get it." The more I shared the more I felt heard like I was lifting this burden off me and by the way the forensic interviewer was talking to me and encouraged me she gave me the message she believed me. All rights reserved. They never came, so I stayed silent. Nightmares. Merryn, then 6, was excited about her first sleepover with her kindergarten classmate Ashley. She told them that, growing up in Illinois, she had experienced tornado drills, fire drills and bus drills; was taught about stranger danger and eight ways to say no to drugs through D.A.R.E., but no one ever taught her how to protect herself from sexual abuse and what to do if a family member or friend molested or raped her. Erin Merryn, force behind Erins Law, tells her story at Metamora Township High School, Central Illinois Poetry Out Loud regional winners announced, Area students named to St. Olaf Colleges Dean's List, Fall archery hunters reach third-highest turkey harvest on record for season, FOP seeks applicants for new Peer Wellness program that will assist law enforcement officers in crisis, Local students make Carthage College dean's list, Local students named to Illinois Wesleyan University's fall 2022 Dean's List, Local students named to Trinity Christian Colleges fall 2022 Dean's List, Illinois Department of Revenue reminds eligible taxpayers to take advantage of Senior Citizens Tax Deferral Program, United Methodists form new church in Washington, District 52 proposes referendum on April ballot, Illinois natives REO Speedwagon return to the Illinois State Fair Grandstand stage, Interrupted Journey exhibition opens at Dickson Mounds Museum, Scots win 12 events at Roger Haynes Invitational, WCHS Panthers bring home All-State Honors, State Titles. The two continued to correspond for seven months. I can remember that as if it happened yesterday. If someone ever does touch you in those areas, you tell immediately., Merryn suggests the books The Swimsuit Lesson and The Right Touch.. Only this time, the person behind it was her older cousin, a nice young man with a bright future to whom she looked at as the brother she never had.. Well, something shocking happened. Glamour magazine named Merryn Woman of the Year 2012, and People magazine named her one of fifteen women changing the world and a HEROES Among us in 2013.[9]. House Bill 105 overwhelminglypassed the Ohio Housea year ago. What's your advice for sexual abuse victims who may want to come forward, but who feel the abuse is better kept secret or forgotten? By breaking your silence you are reclaiming your voice. Through her speeches and books, Erin is an inspiration to professionals working daily to fight child abuse. You didn't just tell one person. And it was at her house the very first overnight that I woke up to her uncle who lived in the home sexually abusing me," said Merryn. I tell parents the best way to talk to kids about this is through the swimsuit lesson, Merryn said. In the wee hours of the night, Ashley's uncle "Richard" (not his real name), who lived in the house with his niece, appeared in the darkened room. He continued to abuse her on and off for nearly two years, she says, often at holidays and celebrations with her close-knit extended family. My parents believed me and my cousin Brian confessed to the police, she said. After graduating, Erin went on to earn her Masters degree in social work, but from time to time she would still consult her little pink childhood diary. Victims are those who don't survive. A place I went to with my eleven year old sister and mother. There is a misconception about this issue many people think sexual abuse only happens to the poor, to people who come from broken homes, etc. The place Erin reclaimed her voice and began her journey to healing. I also tell parents don't give childrens private parts pet names. Oh and of course my cousin's voice echoing through my head "No one will believe you, you have no proof, you will destroy this family, this is our secret!" This law could have given me the ability to know I would be believed, that this is not a secret to keep, and how to report it. The girls were brought to a Children's Advocacy Center where they had to tell their stories to complete strangers, something Erin wasnt looking forward to at all. That is just (in) America. I found (the) freedom and peace I had longed for. In 2008, Erin decided to step up her efforts to protect children nationwide and started writing state legislators to ask them to pass laws requiring schools to better educate children, school employees and parents how to prevent and stop child sexual abuse. Walking up to a door with so many racing thoughts afraid I was not going to be believed, wondering what I was going to be asked, and so ashamed to even think about sharing the dirty secrets. The abuse went on for years. The shame is so overwhelming. After her parents decided to move Erin's abuse ended but only brought her that much closer to her next abuser, an older teenage cousin who lived . Sorry, there are no recent results for popular videos. Erin is now on a mission to persuade all 50 states to pass Erins Law, which mandates that all public schools use age-appropriate curricula to teach students how to tell on anyone who touches or attempts to touch their private parts. 2022 Anchorage Daily News. Then, after seven months of back-and-forths, he wrote a heartfelt apology to Erin and asking for her forgiveness, but also understanding if she couldnt forgive him. Two years later, though,whenErin was 11, she said her older teenage cousin started abusing her too. At age 17, she attempted suicide. See her personal website at ErinMerryn.net. Now she's on a quest to make sure lawmakers across America hear what she has to stay. Merryn's experiences belie the more common parental fears of "stranger danger." [8] In November 2009, she published a second book, Living For Today, discussing earlier abuse by her neighbor. By speaking up even when family is against the idea, it is freedom for a survivor and allows them to reclaim a piece of their lives back. At no time should the school provide the information directly to the student (unless the student is over 18). Erins Law is a tax-exempt 501(c)(4) non-profit organization. In the end, he was given seven years of probation, 1,000 hours of community service, he attended a two-year sex offender program, and couldnt come within 100 feet of Erin or her sister. Behind those numbers are the faces of innocent children whose childhoods were shattered by actions of evil and sickness. I found hope and healing there and people that believed me. Survivors need to know they have nothing to be ashamed of. And it was at her house the very first overnight that I woke up to her uncle who lived in the home sexually abusing me, said Merryn. A survivor of childhood sexual abuse, Erin has worked diligently to lobby every state to pass Erin's Law, beginning with her home state of Illinois in 2009. On this Wikipedia the language links are at the top of the page across from the article title. Alaska Dispatch: You were preyed upon not once, but twice (two different abusers during different stages of childhood). Merryn: Yes. Alaska Dispatch: When you broke your silence and spoke up, was it frightening? A voice that flies across America and speaks at many of these CAC's that exist taking people back to my experience at the CAC and this time sharing all the details because I no longer carry the shame but instead a voice bringing awareness to these incredible centers that give children a new start on life and a path toward healing. Eleven-year-old Erin Merryn's life was transformed on the night she was sexually abused by her cousin, someone she loved and trusted. As for Merryn, today shes married, the mother of an almost 2 year old, and expecting her second child in eight weeks. But at age 11, Merryn's second nightmare began. But instead of telling everyone to vote against it, she told everyone to vote in support of this bill. The woman behind the bill, Erin Merryn visited Paul V. Moore High School in Central Square on Friday, making it [] CENTRAL SQUARE, N.Y. (WSYR-TV) Erin's Law its now in 37 states . However, she said theabuseand rape continueduntil she was almost nine. My sister and I were the only girls that he was around all the time. Erin Merryn is an author, activist, speaker, wife, and mom to young human children and a fur baby named Bailey. I just figured I told my mom, and I never had to talk about this again. February 7, 2023 by Cindy Erin Merryn is a Global Advocate for Child Sex Abuse Prevention For years, Erin Merryn was too scared to speak up about sexual abuse. He cornered her in basements, bathrooms and bedrooms, always reminding her that she shouldn't bother telling anyone because no one would believe her. We live in a society that keeps it hushed and (there is) so much taboo around it; people are afraid to speak up and say this happened to them. However, Merryn said this time the perpetrator was an older cousin, someone she had viewed as a brother figure. Jill Burke is a former writer and columnist for Alaska Dispatch News. What once caused her shame, and something she never wanted to talk about, she now found herself wanting to turn it into a book. Erin, a Chicago-area native, first introduced the legislation in Illinois, and the bill was given her namesake. After years as a teen struggling with nightmares and flashbacks of my abuse, attempting suicide, self-injury, etc., I decided to use that voice to confront my abuser For seven months we corresponded in letters. My abuse first happened at weeks shy of my seventh birthday by a neighbor it went on until age 8 and a half. It was so brutal I thought I was dying, Merryn, Glamour magazines 2012 Woman of the Year, recalled in an interview with the Asbury Park Press. Merryn advocates for sexual abuse victims. The book is titled "Stolen Innocence." In 2010, Merryn began a crusade to get Erin's Law passed across America. "I didn't understand what was going on," she says. Im very concerned about the possibility of grooming or the losing the innocence of our young children. No one would believe me, she recalls this man telling her. That is what brought Erin to tell her story at Metamora Township High School last Monday afternoon, during an all-school assembly. But nothing prepared her for two traumatizing events that have turned Merryn, now 25, into an activist, determined to prevent the same thing from happening to other children. Do not use the phrases good touch and bad touch, says Merryn. In it, Erin chronicles how she cultivated the strength to face her abuser and eventually found relief from years of emotional restlessness, while also igniting the beginnings of a new fearless journey. Merryn: My resilience took a lot of psychological help growing up as a kid, teen, and young adult. I remember walking out into the parking lot and feeling this sense of relief.Seven months later I would return back for the first time since my interview to begin a group with other girls who were survivors in January 1999. Alaska Dispatch: In your quest to get Erin's Law passed in every state, you must have encountered some surprising remarks. Sponsored by Rep. Geran Tarr, D-Anchorage, HB 233 puts Alaska among the states considering "Erin's Law" in 2014. I finally got, after seven months, what I had been looking for: an apology. [5] Erin Merryn (born February 2, 1985) is the author of Stolen Innocence, Living for Today, An Unimaginable Act, Bailey No Ordinary Cat, and The Diary of a Cat Named Carrot. My sister and I told our parents the next day (and) we were referred to the Children's Advocacy Center by police detectives to be interviewed. 35. As I describe in my books, that center was the foundation of my healing. Do I know the difference between the truth and a lie? As the abuse continued, and as she was forced to see her abuser over and over again in social situations, she struggled with self-doubt, panic attacks, nightmares and the weight of whether or not to tell her terrible secret. CAC The place Erin Merryn broke her silence The Children's Advocacy Center of Northwest Cook County Illinois In 1998 seventy five thousand six hundred and forty seven abused children were seen in one hundred and thirty nine Children's Advocacy Centers in America. They talked for hours about what had happened, and the next day told their parents about their shared horror. The only message I got as a child came from my abusers and that was to stay silent or else, she said. CBS News' Reena Ninan visited a public school in Illinois to see how the school teaches kids about safe . I really open lawmakers' eyes when I share this with them. When people ask how I have overcome all that I have and doing what I am doing now, passing Erin's Law in 11 states, 26 introducing it and going to each capital to testify on it, I tell them all of this comes from our creator. She was also afraid she would lose her innocence. Details Eleven-year-old Erin Merryn's life was transformed on the night she was sexually abused by her cousin, someone she loved and trusted. Merryn saidif parents are not comfortable, the bill allows parents toopt their kids out of the education. After describing the difference between the truth and a lie I was asked if I agreed to tell the truth that day. When I look at you, I see nothing but scum. My mom was a mess, that day she probably cried for 10 straight hours, looking at my dad saying, we missed all the red flags, her grades, she was depressed, Erin recalled. "The new bill brings a mandate," Merryn said, "mandating that all (Illinois) schools--pre-school through 12th grade--must begin next fall teaching sexual-abuse prevention education in the schools." Instead I am still running from Brian. Wow, I have a decision to make. But instead of destroying it, she ended up emailing her five-page account of anger and rage to her cousin, who was now attending college. Merryn lay on blankets on the floor next to Ashley, who was in her bed. He sat down in front of Merryn and put his finger to his lips signaling her to remain quiet. Meanwhile, the survivor who came up with the idea aftersufferingher own personal horrors shared her story with senators Tuesday. Are you afraid you will lose business? The path to justice for survivors of sexual assault is not an easy road. Is there anything about your life circumstances that you think made you a target? The only difference is now I am running from him in my dreams" (Merryn 49). She is the force behind passing Erin's Law across America. Read more about Erin Merryn on her Erin's Law Facebook page and her website. Anyone who has felt victimized, ashamed, isolated, and silenced by their abusers will receive a road-map in the book for self-discovery, forgiveness, and empowerment to overcome trauma and live fully and fearlessly for today. Stolen Innocencewas published soon after. They dont warn us about our own family, they dont teach us that in school, her age 12 entry stated. My goal in life is to give a voice to the voiceless and put these predators out of business, she said. Erin Merryn (born February 2, 1985) is the author of Stolen Innocence, Living for Today, and An Unimaginable Act. Why is it so difficult to talk about? In 2013, Governor Quinn signed it into law requiring Illinois schools to teach it every single year. I remember reading this thinking, they dont teach us that in school. Innocence lost. In 2013 Governor Quinn signed Erins Law mandating child sexual abuse education in all Illinois public schools. Gov. She has appeared on Oprah, Today Show, Good Morning America, CNN, Fox, MSNBC, TLC documentary Breaking the Silence, CBS This Morning, Katie Couric, Tamaron Hall, 700 Club, and over 200 local media stations. At the top of the Law. happened, and mom to young human and... A motel is not an easy road as a brother figure in front of Merryn and I am a of! Personal horrors shared her story with senators Tuesday protect herself from evil where she lost! Of this bill fears of `` stranger danger. teach it every single.! Parts pet names childhood ) asked if I agreed to tell her story senators! But at age 11, she said own family, they dont teach us that in school to ashamed! The states considering `` Erin 's Law passed in all Illinois public schools brought to! Is a group advocating for child sexual abuse there are 42 million in... 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